An Old Soul

when we kiss i can hear your thoughts.

so i would rather we didn't.

oh my friends. many of which i have not seen in quite some time, how i miss you.

i miss you i miss you and i miss you.

everyones writing their little end of the year speeches already.

well. i'm not ready yet.

but i will say-that much to my surprise this year turned out COMPLETELY differently then i expected. you're not surprised. you say: come on leah-thats cliche.. well i agree. cliche and ridiculous.

Consequently i'm not sure the kids of pennsylvania college of art and design will be seeing me next year. while i have learned a lot this year i have also learned that i am 99 percent sure that this school is not for me. okay well i'm sure the PCAD kids will never recover.. ahem.. but i simply have to say that i will remember everyone and everything that happened this year, even if it forgets me.

i think thats all i have to say. i just wanted to say i will miss my class-among other people. and maybe i'll stay-1 percent chance. not that i really believe that any of you are concerned.

this entry is kind of scattered. i'm going to write more later. when i can organize my thoughts...okay.

goodnight.

okay i think i need another entry before i go home.

actually i just need to talk.. shocker huh?

so everything is absolutely going great. top notch in fact. i've started reading. [i don't read] and..um..stuff...so..

i had this wonderfully romantic dream the other night. [probably because i got a new down comforter and it's divine i must say.] anyhow-my dream; i was sitting in my room one night and my attention is drawn to the window. there stands a beautiful boy [he was beautiful] he looked like peter from the chronicles of narnia or 'william moseley' if you are as pathetic as me and actually looked his name up. [he's seventeen. ginna and i think that this is a workable age.] his eyes told me every story i needed to know about him. and i knew that he was my soul-mate. yet he seemed so sad and i couldn't stop staring at him. suddenly an entire scene from love actually is played out on my apartment building's lawn. he pulls out these-cue cards-if you will. and i being kiera knightly in the scenerio [thus reinforcing it WAS a dream] am curious as to what this boy i don't even know is doing. and blah blah we've seen the movie-the cue cards tell her that he loves her ..etc. so my eyes are filling with tears and the boy drops the cue cards to run to my door and give me a big romantic movie kiss-like in the old black and white films where they "knew how to be in love." it would be as if we had just been in the most horrible fight and we had to kiss each other extra hard to make everything better, when an anvil falls on him and he dies. thats right straight out of a roadrunner cartoon-the anvil fell on his head. and he died. tragic. yes. typical? double yes.

of course this ridiculous dream was not far off from reality. but i'm still thinking i should lay off the dairy for a while. see how things go for me...

new years resolutions:

-lose 76867095386 pounds. for real.

-get a new pet.

-get more friends. (like you can purchase them at the grocery store..like hey mom-your going to get some hamburger meat for dinner? oh yeah well can you pick me up a new friend while your there? i could really use some advice and good conversation.)

-get a hobby. thats not rambling on about absolutely nothing. 

-become mysterious. (guys like that?)

-eat more grilled chicken and steamed vegitables and less mcnuggets and fries. sigh.

-marry the boy from my dream or william moseley. [he's british. giggle.]

-get warmer socks.

-find out more weird things about my family and childhood.. (i am never dissapointed in this department)

-call someone to fix meg's toliet. [priority]

-find and hold down a boyfriend for more than 3 and a half seconds. [not a priority] 

-sleep more

-whine less

-find a way to break keith urban and nicole kidman up so that i may mother that beautiful man's australian children.

-i repeat -find a hobby.

resolutions anyone?

READ THIS BORED CHRISTMAS BREAKERS.

time for leah to spill her guts;; i know you are all excited.

okay so heres whats going on. [you must be quite bored to care.]

-i am doing a project over break that i requested from my amazing photo teacher who only has nice things to say to me about my work. he's amazing. and even though he doesn't believe in time and thinks it's an elaborate government conspiracy designed to hoard americans into loving the bush administration..i'd still marry him.

-my sister the psycho path is living up to her most envied reputation of doing nothing 24/7 and getting away with it, making people think shes helpless and driving everyone up a freaking wall. may god have mercy on all our souls. is pyscho path hyphenated? how do you spell hyphenated? i obviously need to work out my issues with my sister and this little insight into my life just confirms it.

-my brother is also having his issues. but i still look up to him for some unknown reason. he makes me laugh and defends me when my sister insults me for no apparant reason and he's never involved me or my mom in his problems-maybe thats why.

-i've decided the reason i've been so down recently has been my apartment and how disgusting it is. so i cleaned it the other day and did my laundry-if by some act of God i keep it this way then its a miracle and i might be happier.

-another thing is my diet. its just disgraceful and my mother would not approve-this is how i know it is part of whats keeping me down. in the past two months i've gained 10 pounds. so one of my more cliche resolutions will be to get healthy and lose 25 pounds.  

-my neice is cuter than ever, and this my friends is quite an acomplisment on her part, i must say, because most of the time i find babies obnoxious and kind of boring. they have to be extra cute to catch my eye. it would be more amazing if she was a boy. because girls are just cuter babies and she had that on her side but brenden linkens will have to take the cake on that one. such a ladies man at 2. i hated myself for a moment when i had to melt after he squeezed me tight and hearing something to the effect of: i love you leah.

-iiiii...absolutely hate when i'm over-dramatic. i ALWAYS regret it later. it never EVER fails.. i'm sitting there after i've done the stupid, and i'm like: leah mae adams-you are an asshole. why do you even talk? just suck it up, and whatever i was soooo worked up about *gasp* just seems like the dumbest thing ever. but the worst part is when i involve others in my moment of gay. (and 99.9 % of the time i do.) so if i have ever had a moment with you where you were like: 'leah. you are the biggest drama queen shut your mouth before i do it for you.' i do sincerely apoligize and hope to in the future correct this flaw in my personality. do know that how much you are annoyed with me doesn't even compare to how embarrased i am about it later.

well my dad just abruptly burst in the room and i have now completely lost any hope of concentration but i hope to write more later. i love writing and photography.

please comment. i miss being xanga popular.

side thought;; why must i always choose words i have no hope of knowing how to spell in my writing. it makes me look extremely ignorant. and i even won the 7th grade spelling bee. i am a disgrace. end side thought.

againstF0RGETING: what happened.
againstF0RGETING: and by . i mean ?

yet again proving my moronic-ness.